Scent vs flavour

I've had this pet peeve for a while, but since working at Body Shop, it's come to a head. It bugs me when people ask if I have soap in a certain flavour. Are you going to eat the soap? Rip of the plastic and take a nice big bite of Satsuma? Doubtful.

They should be saying they want the soap in a certain scent. I've given up correcting customers, because it literally happens on a daily basis, but I do correct my co-workers from time to time.

Gram's middle finger

Since I've had my license, I've only driven with Grandma in the car a few times, but I always feel as though I have precious cargo. I drive more carefully, I obey all the rules, and I try not to get road rage. One time though, I was driving Grams and I back from Red Robin and we ran into a whole new kind of bad driver on Lougheed. He cut me off, and then drove way too slow, and then slammed on the brakes before going into the turning lane. We had to pass him, so I had every intention of looking over and giving him a dirty look, that way Grams wouldn't see it. As we start to go around him though, something comes into my peripheral vision, and next thing you know, Grams is pulling on her seat belt, practically in my lap, giving the guy beside us her middle finger. I couldn't believe it, and neither could he. That's got to be the pinnacle moment when you know you're a bad driver, when grandma flips you the bird.

That's why you're awesome Grams, love you so much :)

My lettuce hero

I was in Save-On-Foods the other day, and I pulled the classic "I don't need a basket, I'm only getting a couple things" gig. So there I am in the produce section holding two cartons of ice cream, some face cream, a chicken pot pie, and a cesar salad dressing perched on one arm while I tried to stuff a head of wet romain lettuce in the small plastic bag. I struggled for a good minutes and a half, without dropping anything might I add before an older lady swooped in to save me. All she had to do was grab one side of the bag, but I appreciated her help. She gave me a look like she'd been there before.

And speaking of lettuce, my sister started using it instead of a bun on her veggie burgers. Despite being slightly skeptical, it was actually pretty tasty.

Poo walk

Every dog owner knows when their pooch is about to poop. They start waddling in that funny way...dad could call it everytime when we took Indy for a walk tonight. We started lauging when I joked about when people do the walk. We've all seen it. Heck, some of us have even been there, although I'm not admitting to that. "Hows it going over there Ted?" 

"Fantastic, I always hobble like I have no knees in the direction of the bathroom..."

Chocolate bunnycicle

When I was a kid, my sister and I used to stick our big chocolate easter bunnies in the freezer. When we wanted some, we'd pull them out and start nawing away on the huge frozen chunk. I'd never considered this normal, until the other night I got talking about food with my friend Kelsey, and she used to do the same thing. I can't even remember why we did that, but I can't help but wondering how many other people did it too.

Black neck

Since wearing make up on a semi regular basis, some things have come up that I didn't anticipate. When I sneeze, I try doing it without closing my eyes, and if they get watery, I can't rub them. Also, if I put my glasses on too soon after putting on mascara, my lashes rub the lenses and make a huge mess. On a more embarrassing note, the other day when Greg came over, he asked what was on my neck. He tried rubbing the lines away, but he couldn't. I realized when I looked in the mirror, that I had large black lines streaming down to my neck from my eyes. I had gotten upset earlier, and didn't even think to check. He teased me while I washed my face.

Shoe section farter

Yesterday I was at Value Village shopping around with Greg, looking for good finds to use our 30% off coupon on. Since I had no luck in the womens size five section, I decided to check out the girls shoes. They happen to be situated just across from where most of the boots are. As I was standing the middle of the isle paroosing the racks, something grazed my hand. When I turned to see what it was, my eye encountered a BUTT! Some lady was bent over, trying on a pair of boots, and somehow didn't notice her rear end had actually touched my HAND! Ew ew ew ew.  Needless to say I moved away. The thing is, the boots she was trying on were either leather, or pleather and she was sockless. The action of squeezing them on was creating a farting noise. I couldn't muffle my laughter anymore, I had to leave.