Embarrassing tentacle

Whenever someone asks, "what is your most embarrassing moment?" I have a few great stories to pick from. Foot in mouth is sometimes a constant state of being for me. One such occasion happened way back in 2001, at a little place called Banting Middle School. Since most of the class didn't bother to show up (snow maybe?), instead of teaching us, my teacher decided to have us read scripts from Star Wars. Anyone familiar with the series remembers the part where Luke Skywalker and his gang is stuck in a garbage compactor, and there's a large octopus-like monster trying to kill them.

Well the line was, "the BIG, SLIMY tentacle grabbed Luke and pulled him under the garbage" Oh yes, that's right ladies and gentlemen, not only was I 13 and I said the word TESTICLE in front of everyone, but it happened to have BIG and SLIMY in front of it. If you've ever seen an entire room full of people, teacher included, laugh so hard they all fall on the floor, you know how dramatic and humiliating this was. It would probably have bothered me more if I could have caught my breath and got up off the floor.

Beef with email ads

Lately I've found myself super critical of email ads, which isn't hard because I get a lot of them. I'm members of all the deal sites, and I LOVE putting my name, and conveniently my email in for draws. One day three caught my eye in one email.

Look! Take these pills and you can be headless too! Who needs healthy food and exercise? One catch, you have to be great with photoshop. 

I want to know where in Granville Island this was taken, because it looks like somewhere tropcial off a coast. Very unlike the water I've seen near Granville Island...

And in their defense, this picture is completely accurate. Anyone who's ever taken photo's in a photobooth with props, which is a new trend at weddings and other events, knows this to be true. If there's four shots, count your entire head to be blocked out in at least one of them. 

Innovation

Think outside the box a little, it's the only way to survive! Especially in public washrooms, where despite someone steeling the hook, at Ikea no less, putting your purse on the floor is simply not an option. No hook thief will ruin my day! Is a hook thief called a hooker? Buya!

Topless meet cute

If you haven't seen the movie "The Holiday" get on it. But you can't borrow my copy, because I already lent it out once, never got it back and had to re-buy it.

So in the movie it describes the first time the two people meet as the meet cute. I had a first interaction with a random guy that was so strange I couldn't keep it to myself. A while back I dropped by Aleisha's work specifically to drop off a jacket I'd borrowed, but then I got a smoothie, and chit chatted, and eventually got back to my car, jacket still in my possession. So even though I was running late (when am I not?) I decided to run it back in, literally run. As I flung open the door, a guy turned the corner and started to come out. He was all, "Oh this is great! A new kind of chivalry, a girl that holds the door for the guy!" I smiled, but this is still not too out of the ordinary right? So I give Aleisha her jacket, and head back for my car. As I pass the minivan parked beside me, there's door guy, half-naked, blocking my drivers side door. I was a little awe-struck, not because a ripped guy is now smiling at me, and blushing, but I literally had no where to go. What are the chances of that? He thought it was just great, and wanted to chat me up again. I waited until he was finished changing, and then I got in my car and left, still laughing.

Trainwreck Facebook friend

We all have at least one person on Facebook whom we follow because they're a trainwreck. Why we follow those people might be a little different, maybe it's for comic relief, or to feel better about yourself and your life. But I almost guarantee you there's someone who when they're posts come up you think, "For a regular person, this is ludicrous, but for this person, just another day in the life.." Sometimes I'll be sitting around doing whatever it is I do in my daily life and when a notification goes off on my phone I get excited. I think, "here we go, can't wait, it's so-and-so" No, I'm not giving away my sources, but keep up the good work trainwrecks!

For the record, the word "trainwreck" must be code for large bundles of pot, because that's what came up when I googled it.

Misconception

For those of you who find my blog through my Facebook wall, you might have been a little confused when one of my recent posts popped up. When I wrote  "Hard choice", it popped up on my Facebook wall with the same picture of Greg as in the post, but without the birthday cake. I might have accidentally generated more pageveiws. Anyways, Greg and I are happy as clams, just celebrated our four year anniversary earlier this month. I hope those 40 people weren't disappointed to find out the hard choice was between Star Trek or beer. 

Grisly 10k

For the third time time now, I set out to run the BC Cancer Foundation's 10k Underwear Affair, but this year I was armed with a goal. I wanted to run it in under and hour. The first year I ran it in 1h24m, and the year before I'd run it in 1h12mins, so I was just shaving off another 12 minutes right? 

Well the truth is, this determination to reach my goal ultimately lead to my demise. I wanted to get there so badly that before the run when one of the vendors offered me something and said, "this will give you energy!" I ate it. I ate it all. If it wasn't for my Uncle Kevin running with me and telling me to breath and coaching me, I probably wouldn't have finished. I had a large herd of UNICORNS trying to get out of my STOMACH by the 3rd kilometer. The 8th wasn't so hot either. It helped having a friendly face at the third water station, my friend Sarah volunteered this year, what a sweetheart.

When I crossed the finish line, I thought the clock said 1h5mins, and I was disappointed, but happy considering. Aleisha had some trouble with her asthma, so we hit the medical tent, where I released the unicorns into their garbage can, but look, they gave me this cute little barf bag!

When we checked our times later, mine came up at 1h10mins, with Uncle Kevin just behind me, and Aleisha not far after that. We hit the beer tent, and then the after party together and had a great night. All in all the event was a BLAST and I loved it. 

And next year, watch out -10k in under an hour is within my reach :)